C H L O E ♥

Sunday, October 09, 2011

Family. ♥

Life's a bitch. Fucking bitch.

Just now, I was lamenting about my fucked-up life in the house, and asked my mother, "Would you rather be a happy dog or a sad human?"

I know I shouldn't have asked that. I silently crossed my fingers, hoping that will undo what I asked.

But anyway. Bottom-line is, if I were to lead such a sad life, I'd rather be dead.

Yes, I am inpatient. I cannot wait for 10 years down the road when my life may be better. But that's just a hypothesis. I declare I am pessimistic. What if life don't get any better? Okay, now there comes a sentence that says life is in your hands, you choose how you want it to turn out. Or, it's not your fault if you are born poor, but it your fault if you die poor.

Seriously? These sentences varies from people to people. It works for some, it doesn't for the others. Some people toil for a couple of years and Lady Luck shows herself to them. No wait, some don't even get to toil. THEY are Mr and Miss Lucky themselves.Getting whatever fuck they want but still don't cherish it.

Some toil for decades. Nothing is reaped. I'm not talking about myself. I am lucky enough already I fucking know, stop judging. I've seen people whom I am very sympathetic over. And what? They had longed for a better life in the past too.

And there's so many other factors that may deem if you will make it through hard times. Family's support etc. If you suffer from family rejection, friends' denials, self-repudiation, and all the shit in the world and you still make it through those shit, you are good.

And that's cuz some people don't need any support, emotionally, physically, or mentally.

I NEED.

So stop judging. I've came out of the judging thingy when I finally put themselves in my shoes.

EVERYONE IS FUCKING DIFFERENT.

FUCK SERIOUSLY?! Am I doing this? I am arguing with myself. And guess what? Handsdown, I am going to suck it up and make my life better. But that doesn't eliminate the fact that a certain someone or two someones in my family is fucked up.

Please man. Nobody owes you a living. You owe your mother a living, to be frank. So please fucking show her some fucking respect. You got what you want. I am so called going through the stage that you claimed to go through previously. Be contented and happy and stop digging people's graves.

Can you please grow a little bit more brains and know that family is the most important thing ever. How the hell do you grow so big and strong, if not? Strong enough for you to physically attack people. Fucking hell. Who fed you? And now you are letting them wonder if they have fed you shit all the while previously. Who bathed you? Who taught you to walk? And now you are using the same pair of legs to walk away from them when they are talking to you. Who taught you to speak your first words? And now you are using that same old bloody mouth to scold them. Who paid and sent you to school? And now you are showing them that the hard-earned money they had to sent you to school was washed down the drain because you turn out to be this ungrateful, unfilial dog.

Didn't you fucking realize no matter how much evil you are doing or have done, they are still loving you and still concerned about your everything?

This is why families are great. They accept who you are without judging, and come what may. You can be your own true self, emit your true emotions, and they will still be there.

But you, this selfish ingrate, took advantage of that. Please. Nobody is your slave. They don’t owe you a living. You do.

I have enough of ranting for now. Lappie fucking hung on me just now, and my feel for furious typing is gone.

I feel better and stronger already anyway. Kudos. Screw people who let me down. Who needs you.

Till next time.

♠ Posted by Chloeee At 9:02 PM